


things you didn't say at all

by wombuttress



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-08
Updated: 2016-02-08
Packaged: 2018-05-19 06:40:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5957401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wombuttress/pseuds/wombuttress
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tabris cannot spit it out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	things you didn't say at all

For him, the _‘I love you’_ comes quickly and effortlessly, with complete truthfulness.

What did she say in response, the first time? She can’t remember, but it was probably some kind of crude joke—a deflection tactic. She’d been in moderate shock ever since the rose, which was an _I love you_ just as surely as the words themselves. How could he possibly love her, how could she possibly love him? It’s not so much that she thinks she doesn’t deserve him—she deserves the fucking world, and she’ll fight anybody who contradicts her—she just doesn’t get it. Nothing about their personalities, their histories, their attitudes, mesh well in the slightest. What was it about a scrappy, muss-haired alienage elf who slaughtered her way through an estate full of shems in a wedding dress that loved this ridiculous man-shaped puppy? What was it about this honorable, good man, this absurdly pure soul, that loved anything about an angry, unapologetic murderer? It just wasn’t right, it didn’t make sense. Women with bad attitudes and no sense of fair play had nothing to do with good, honorable men.

She never did quite figure it out, not then, when there was a Blight to worry about, but she did accept it. Oh, well. You love him, he loves you. That’s life! Full of surprises, innit?

After that it goes like this:

A fight narrowly survived, the exultation of being alive—

“I love you.”

“You should Wynne to look at that cut, it looks nasty.”

A casual hug around her narrow shoulders, a comforting hand at her back—

“I love you.”

“It’s too damn cold in the Frostbacks to prance around without a damn cloak, would you put one on?”

A long day, the sweet release of being able to simply collapse next to someone and rest—

“I love you.”

“Get some sleep.”

A tight quick squeeze, his large and calloused hand around hers—

“I love you.”

“Stay safe out there.”

And it somehow completely slips her mind, what with the darkspawn and all, that she’s never actually _said_ it, until, in fact, the most wildly inconvenient moment possible. It’s the event that will be known forever as the Battle of Denerim, a day won by the most legendary Grey Warden in history. She hasn’t slept in two solid days, she’s covered in burning darkspawn blood, there’s a greatsword clattering to the ground and a slain archdemon at her feet.

 _Huh_ , she thought, looking down at her warm, living body. _Look at that. Not dead!_

He moves into her peripheral vision, calling her name. Her given name—oh, she hates that name. She hasn’t let anybody except him call her that since mother had died.

It’s with that thought sluggishly moving through her battle-fried mind that she slowly turns to look at him—he’s beautiful, isn’t he, wide-eyed and hopeful, terrified in the same breath _._

 _You know, he does look rather dashing in battle, doesn’t he?_ “Alistair.” She can feel the insane smile crawl over her face. Andraste’s tits, she’s tired.

 _Oh, shit,_ she thinks, the thought of it surfacing like a fish to the top of a murky pond. _Did I seriously never say it? Did I never actually_ tell _him?_

 _”_ Hey,” she says, swaying slightly. _I love you,_ she tries. “Got ‘im for you,” is what comes out instead, as she grins and points with her thumb at the archdemon corpse.

And that’s it, that’s all she has left in her. It’s nap time now. Darkness eats at the edges of her vision and she feels herself tipping over, smiling irrepressibly and knowing that someone would catch her. 

She’ll say it when she wakes up. This time, she’ll really, definitely tell him.

Probably.

 

**Author's Note:**

> [my tumblr](http://gayspacejew.tumblr.com/)   
>  [my oc blog](http://piile-of-dragon-filth.tumblr.com/)


End file.
